An unraveling or an awakening?
i guess to put words to my current emotional state, its a lot of unprocessed grief. its feeling all the emotions associated with events that at the time i could not find the words to express what i was feeling. the emotion was too big to process at the time of the event and there was a laundry list of things i had to do..my to do list (now i say fuck the list, its never done anyway) but the events i tucked, wayyyyy down in my sock for later just like the pile of bills i tuck over in the corner for later or the closet that i'll organize later. midlife, some call a crisis, i prefer to call it my awakening. its as if my rose colored glasses have come off and i am seeing all the pieces of life and relationships and people and behavior and reactions and memories and experiences as they truly are and i cant unsee it. the toothpaste is out of the tube. i am rebuilding one brick at a time and figuring out what this next chapter of me will look like. the awakening had begun a while ag...
